"For a while we pondered whether to take a vacation or get a divorce. We decided that a trip to Bermuda is over in two weeks, but a divorce is something you always have."

"Seventy percent of success in life is showing up."

"If my film makes one more person miserable, I've done my job."

"The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep."

"Thought: why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only for food: frequently there must be a beverage."

"Doing abominations is against the law, particularly if the abominations are done while wearing a lobster bib."

"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."

"Bad times wake us up to the good times we weren't paying attention to."

"If there be any truer message of a man than by what he does, it must be by what he gives."

"Aim at heaven and you will get earth thrown in. Aim at earth and you get neither."

"All human beings should try to learn before they die what they are running from, and to, and why."

"Bureaucracy and social harmony are inversely proportional to each other."